This is the last in a series or columns on forgiveness in connection with the Jubilee of Mercy.
The process of forgiveness does not begin after the offense; actually, forgiveness begins even before the offense. In other words, we train ourselves and prepare ourselves to forgive when we root our lives in love, even heroic love. Forgiveness, more times than not, is not a sudden decision; rather, forgiveness is the result of training our minds and hearts to love even in difficult moments.
Ultimately, forgiveness needs a foundation, a starting point; this starting point is love.
For the Christian — for any person — life must be rooted in love in order to forgive. Forgiveness is impossible without love. Love, ultimately, is rooted in God for “God is love” (1 John 4:8).
Love really means to want what is good for another. When sin entered into the world, God still wanted what was good for humanity and creation. Thus, with the dawn of sin, God’s love became justice and mercy — with justice always leading toward mercy. Salvation history is really about God giving humanity a “second chance,” that is, bestowing forgiveness.
Jesus is the ultimate sign of God’s love and mercy. God’s love and mercy in Jesus will take him to the end of his life: “having loved his own who were in the world, he loved them to the end” (cf. John 13:1). Jesus’ love and mercy were poured out continuously during the final hours of his life as he was being betrayed, denied, abandoned and tortured upon the cross. One of his last words were: “Father, forgive them; for they do not know what they are doing” (Luke 23:34).
For the Christian, to forgive is to be rooted in God’s love and mercy that come to us in Jesus. One of Jesus’ last instructions to the church was: “…love one another as I have loved you…” (John 13:34). Jesus had shown during the last hours of his life that love is muscular and courageous. It is not a love of hearts, chocolates and flowers; rather, it is a love that is able to stand strong even before hatred, evil and the weight of humanity’s sinfulness.
For the Christian, to forgive — to begin to forgive — is to be rooted in this courageous and muscular love. Saint Paul expresses this love both eloquently and as a challenge: “Love is patient, love is kind. It is not jealous, (love) is not pompous, it is not inflated, it is not rude, it does not seek its own interests, it is not quick-tempered, it does not brood over injury, it does not rejoice over wrongdoing but rejoices with the truth” (1 Corinthians 13:4-6).
It is this love that sets the stage for forgiveness.
Ultimately for the Christian, to forgive is to be “merciful like the Father” (the theme of the Extraordinary Jubilee Year of Mercy). A most beautiful image of the Father’s merciful love comes in the parable of the Prodigal Son (also known as the parable of the Merciful Father) found in Luke 15:11-32. Although the younger son demanded his inheritance (basically he told his father to “drop dead” because an inheritance is received only upon the death of another) and he wasted it on dissolute living, the Father, nevertheless, upon seeing the son from a distance, ran to him, embraced him, kissed him, welcomed him home and threw a banquet for his long-lost son. This is the heavenly Father’s love and mercy: unbounded, lavish, not holding back. It is to this love that we are called: “Because you are God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, clothe yourselves with heartfelt mercy, with kindness, humility, meekness, and patience. Bear with one another; forgive whatever grievances you have against one another. Forgive as the Lord has forgiven you.” (Colossians 3:12-13).
It is when we choose to love like this, day-in and day-out, that we are transformed into a people ready to forgive, ready to be merciful when the time comes. This might seem impossible; but with God (Love), nothing is impossible.