A measure of consolation, hospitality and hope

The celebration of a Roman Catholic funeral revolves around three rites, the Vigil for the Deceased, the Funeral Mass, and the Burial and Committal.

Within the context of a Christian funeral, some variations have evolved and are permitted by the church, as long as the three rites are celebrated. These variations could occur if the body of the deceased is cremated, or if the family has decided to celebrate a funeral liturgy without a Mass.

The church’s first preference is for Funeral Rites with the Body present. The second preference is for Funeral Rites with the Body present and cremation afterward. The third preference is for Funeral Rites with the Cremated Remains present.

The Vigil

The Vigil (or Wake) is celebrated between the time of death and the funeral liturgy. Without the rite, it is simply called the viewing, a time for the gathering and visitation of family, friends and acquaintances.

Arrangements for the viewing have also evolved over the years. The Old World tradition of holding the wake or viewing in the home is still practiced on occasion. More popular is the practice of holding the viewing in the funeral home. The third option is to have the viewing in the parish worship space.

Following the Order of Christian Funerals, the Vigil revolves around the Liturgy of the Word. Readings, psalms, music and intercessory prayers can be offered by a priest, deacon or lay person. (Praying the rosary or other devotional prayers is not part of, nor a substitute for, this rite.) The Vigil also provides an appropriate time for family and friends to come forward and share their memories and stories about the life of the deceased person. 

The scheduling of the Vigil brings yet another set of options. The Old World tradition of keeping watch during the night has evolved to an evening gathering.

The newest trend is to hold the visitation in the morning, either at the funeral home or in the parish church, followed immediately by the funeral liturgy.

Each of those options presents challenges and opportunities.

Viewing on the morning of the liturgy

Msgr. Burton explained that in the traditional model, “the three station model in the Latin funeral rite, the prayers have to do with grieving and beginning to let go.”

“The Mass focuses on hope of the resurrection,” he continued. “The final committal, which is a very short rite held at the cemetery, is the handing over the person to God. Here there is a brevity, a serenity, and a trust that the person is in the hands of God.”

There are reasons that a family will decide to schedule all of the rites in one day. Annemarie Norton, director of Norton Funeral Home, Williamstown, talked about the surviving elderly spouse who might have difficulty handling an emotional evening at the viewing followed by a long and often traumatic day of the funeral and burial.

Norton said that at other times the family is conscious of the long travel family and friends may have to make, and schedule the three rites so that those from further away have only one trip to make.

“Those kinds of decisions are caught up in the tendency to be neat and clean and efficient,” said Msgr. Burton. “One of the hesitations I’ve always had with the four-hour span of a one-day funeral is whether we are short-circuiting the grieving process.”

Msgr. Burton said that this tight time frame may actually be harder on the family. After those four to six hours, visitors return to their normal routines.  “Everyone except the family,” said Msgr. Burton, “who’s bereaved and still struggling in their own sorrow. You want to be careful to not deny that.”

Viewing held in the church

Holding the viewing in a parish church also presents some logistical considerations, but as pastor of Nativity Parish, Franklinville, Father Thomas Donio explained, it is often a fitting place, especially “for those who have made the church and parish life a central part of their life.”

Msgr. Burton added that when a decision is made to have a viewing in the church, “the first consideration is for the family itself.” Is the family at home in the space? The church acknowledges that there will be family members and friends who are not comfortable in church, and even makes a note in the Funeral Rite to bring attention to that.

“There’s a special consideration for those who may only be in church once in awhile — for funerals or weddings,” explained Msgr. Burton. “We need to recognize that this could be a link for them. Depending on our posture, this could be an invitation to them, as well as an enhancement to their faith.”

As people come together inside the gathering space of a funeral home or a church, they greet each other, share memories, look at displays of photos, and sometimes even enjoy a video of special moments in the deceased’s life. Some Catholics may be disturbed when some of that carries into the worship space of the parish church. Yet it is natural. “Most people are generally respectful in church. They know how to act,” said Msgr. Burton.

Inside St. Vincent Pallotti, large gatherings have come together for several recent funerals: a young mother who succumbed to cancer, a soldier and a neighborhood hero who was killed in Iraq. Even with the long lines wrapping through and around the church at these and other funerals, the church is a comforting space, Msgr. Marucci said. “Compassionate and patient people came to spend time with the families in an enormous flowing of support,” he said.

When a viewing and a funeral are held on the same day, Msgr. Marucci uses soft music and incense to help make the transition between the two rites.

“We need to be hospitable,” said Msgr. Burton. Parishes should be ready to accommodate requests for proper use of flags and special honors, photo collages and video players. With policies in place, the church can often offer some of the personal touches that help comfort the families, while still maintaining the sacredness of the worship space.

The rites of a Christian funeral help the faithful as they grapple with the end of the earthly journey that began at baptism. The symbols that are used during the Mass — holy water, the paschal candle, and the white funeral pall (on the casket, but not on the vessels holding cremated remains) — are symbols of that baptism.

Immediately after the Eucharist, the Final Commendation takes place, “a farewell by which the Christian community together pays respect to one of its members before the body is removed or buried. Death, of course, always has involved an element of separation, but Christians as Christ’s members are one in him and not even death can part them from each other” (Order of Christian Funerals).

This is the third in a series of articles on Catholic funeral practices.