Juan came to Mass this week because he needed to pray for someone who was murdered in his apartment complex. He wasn’t sure if the person was male or female, and it does not matter. Juan needed to pray for the soul of the individual and find some consolation from God in these tough times.
Recently, former First Lady Michelle Obama shared with the world her bout with depression given these difficult days of the pandemic, the political infighting in Washington, the great social unrest especially shown in our streets and a world that seems utterly directionless. Meanwhile, the University of North Carolina in Chapel Hill lasted one week with “in person” instruction and resorted to online education given an outbreak of coronavirus cases. Notre Dame University just went online for two weeks to see if they can contain the spread on its campus (147 cases, last reported). Many will say off campus parties, no social distancing and little mask wearing contributed to the spread of cases.
We can suggest that our young sense they are invulnerable to this virus and act foolishly or without caution. But I think there is a deeper issue present of which I know much about. It is a lack of discipline. People don’t want the hassle of having to wear masks, to keep distance and to be confined in any way. Discipline is difficult and takes much time, practice and effort whether this be in work, diet, play or prayer. It takes commitment and a sense of vision that is greater than the present moment and us.
When a lack of success in discipline manifests itself in frustration, it can lead to many unhealthy directions (addictions, emotional paralysis, turning away from God and onto the self) and some deadly consequences (violence, destruction, suicide and murder).
Within the last couple of months, Philadelphia has come undone with gun violence resulting in many injured and dead. A powder keg is festering with the homeless encampment near the art museum. No one knows what to do.
I cannot keep up with the unrest in Chicago and Portland. Have things settled down in Seattle? I have never seen such turmoil like this. I had to admit recently that I am suffering a bit of paralysis, depression or internal malaise. I find myself “maintaining” the parish, trying to be attentive to the needs of others but really struggling to give direction, a sense of a future for this “new year,” while neglecting a personal healthy self-maintenance that benefits the physical and the spiritual.
We cannot deny that these are tough times and may not get better fast, especially with our lack of discipline. Many of my former and healthy outlets are gone, at least in the “live” sense such as sports (the way they used to be), concerts, theater and dinners with family and friends. I am struggling with the inability to visit Oblates in our assisted care facility where two of my dearest friends live. I appreciate the moratorium on visiting has resulted in no coronavirus cases to a house where maybe 50 of our men live, but it is tough, especially for them.
What are we to do? Well, a good start is to go to the first step of humility and admit that we are not God and God is in charge. In so doing, we need to put all our trust and confidence in God now more than ever. If we discipline ourselves to this task in these most difficult times, perhaps it will give us a better “habit of discipline,” a better prayer life, a healthier appreciation of God and one another for the long haul.
Perhaps, people will return to God and to Mass (when they feel safe to do so). Maybe God will become the center of our lives that anything contrary (hate, division, rejection, violence) will be eroded to where it ceases to exist. We can’t do this. But God can. If we let God.
What does this look like? It’s a lot of silence and alone time. It demands quieting all competing voices to solely concentrate on the sole person that matters. It means being patient with what may seem to be unproductive time, nothing happening, and just asking for God’s grace, presence and consolation. It means “listening” and “waiting” (not rushing to talk), two difficult things that require patience, discipline and practice. It may be sitting there in God’s presence without hearing anything but being present, nonetheless. It may be a sense of being loved, accepted and cared for. It may result in a lot of emotions filling up in your heart, soul and mind. It may result in tears that are evidence of forgiveness, acceptance and unconditional love. It may be a resolve to recommit yourself to God and God’s will for the world.
It may be a word, an idea, a gesture or a phrase from Scripture (The Lord is my Shepherd, there is nothing more I shall want. My grace is enough for you. Know that I am with you always. Before you were formed in your mother’s womb, I knew you.) or a novel thought (Walk with me. Let me love you whole and entire. I’m not going to stop loving and forgiving you.)
It will probably be a sense of the awesomeness of God and our unworthiness. But apparently God is OK with this. It’s we who have to let God be ridiculously loving, forgiving, re-energizing us time and time again and then more so. God is God and we are not. We are foolish not to put all our trust and confidence in God.
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