This Mother’s Day, look to our mother in heaven, too

When I was in junior high school, my neighbor approached the bus stop, and rolling her eyes, she said, “You won’t believe what my brother did yesterday. He called my mom collect to wish her a Happy Mother’s Day!” All of us gasped, but one person said, “At least he called her!”

Well, although a collect call was not optimal, a neglected phone call would have been worse. It makes you wonder how many children do not call their mothers because of some sense of shame. They may think, “She doesn’t want to hear from me in jail. My call will just upset her.” Or, “If I call her, she’ll be able to tell that I’m still using. I’ll wait until I am clean, and then I’ll call.” It must be heartbreaking for any mom not to hear from her child.

Likewise with our mother in heaven. There are some people who think they should not pray or go to church until they feel their life is all together. They feel like a hypocrite, and even label others as hypocrites who pray and go to church while they are still sinners. Yet, we will always be sinners, so why not reach out to our mother in heaven now so that she can help us?

Did you know that Mary loves you as a mother loves her children? In Saint John’s Gospel, Jesus told the beloved disciple, “Behold your mother.” To Mary, he said, “Behold your son.” At that moment, the Church believes that Jesus made Mary the mother of all of us.

Whether your mother is living or deceased, whether your relationship with your mother is wonderful or strained, whether you were raised by your mother or never knew her – Mary is our mother in heaven. You can ask Mary’s help and guidance; you can cry out to her when you are suffering; you can simply behold her by thinking of her or by gazing at a painting of her. Know that she is, in fact, beholding you, too.

Just like it is important to call our mothers regularly and visit them, we can check in with Mary regularly with our prayers. We might give our earthly mother flowers as a gift. You can think of each Hail Mary as a flower and each rosary a bouquet to give to Mary. Mary not only sees our prayers as beautiful, but also the way we love one another: when we utter a kind word instead of a criticism, when we forgive others rather than hold a grudge, when we are the first to make a phone call instead of stubbornly waiting for others to call us.

We never have to worry that our love for Mary is in some way idolatrous – after all, to love her is to love what she said to the waiters at the wedding of Cana, “Do whatever He tells you.”

This Mother’s Day, after you have visited your mother in person, on the phone or at her gravesite, take the time to tell your mother in heaven, “I love you.” Then, take the time to thank God for giving you the gift of your own mother and His mother as your own, too.

Sister M. Emily Vincent Rebalsky, IHM, is the program director at Villa Maria by the Sea Retreat Center, Stone Harbor. For more information about retreats at Villa Maria by the Sea, visit VMbytheSea.com. For information about discerning a vocation with the Sisters, Servants of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, Malvern, PA, visit ihmimmaculata.org.