By Joanna Gardner
Earlier this month, on Dec. 4, Sister Helen Cole’s entire staff at Guadalupe Family Services in Camden was present in court as Osvaldo Rivera was sentenced to 110 years in prison. In 2012 he broke into a Camden home in the early morning, sexually assaulted a 12-year-old girl and murdered her 6-year-old brother when the boy stepped in to defend his sister.
Sister Helen sat beside the victims’ grandparents as the court handed down the 110-year sentence. More than 12 people read victim impact statements, including teachers from Dominick Andujar’s school, his mother, and his sister, now 14-year-old Amber Andujar.
Tim Gallagher, a community outreach worker on Sister Helen’s staff, helped the family produce a CD of pictures of Dominick played in the courtroom.
“When they give those statements, the family members are standing two feet away from this murderer. It’s a very intense, emotional experience,” Gallagher said. “Now that the sentencing has happened and the prosecutor’s office goes away, our office stays with this family and will continue to walk with them as they go through the healing process and continue with their lives.”
This is what Sister Helen, a Sister of St. Joseph means when she uses the word “companioning.” Her staff — another full-time social worker, Lourdes Alvarez; herself; Gallagher; and several long-term volunteers — walk with families through the grueling court process, help them write their victim impact statements, plan memorials and special events. Sister Helen herself does about 20 hours worth of counseling a week.
Two years, as in the Rivera case, Sister Helen says, is quick timing for sentencing. Some of the families she sees don’t even get to court until four or five years after the incident, and many will return to court for appeals.
“Once he’s sentenced, a whole new phase of grieving happens,” Sister Helen said. “There’s no distraction now from your grief.”
After a sentencing, Sister Helen will stay with her families for up to another year, meeting on a weekly and eventually a monthly basis.
“Grieving is a sacred pain. When you lose somebody, when somebody dies, that grief you feel really has to do with your experience of loving and being loved in return. It’s so unique; I tell them, ‘no one else has your pain.’ Because it has to do with relationship,” Sister Helen said.
“It’s an honor to be where I’ve been.”
In 2012, Sister Helen received a papal honor. When she talks about it, she is adamant that the award is not for her alone, but also for her staff and the original team of Jesuits that invited her to begin ministering in North Camden 20 years ago.
“When I’m hopeless, it’s time for me to go,” Sister Helen said. “Out of every situation I still have hope. So when that day comes that I feel hopeless and I feel like there’s nothing that can get better or change, then I think its time for me to go. But right now I still have tremendous hope.”
Much of her hope comes from seeing the youth that Guadalupe Family Services assists through a variety of other programs it runs in the neighborhood. These include a five-week summer program for children, a week-long teen summer “adventure” week, drug and violence prevention classes at nearby Holy Name School, and a year-long program for teens in Camden that meets weekly to foster academic success, spiritual development and community service.
Many of the youth who participate in her programs have family members who have been murdered, she says.
“I’m a witness to healing. I have been in this job for a long time now and I have seen people heal,” Sister Helen said. “You will never be the same person that you were the minute before your loved one was murdered, but it’s possible to heal.”